What does the Church say about Transgender Individuals?

The Church website has an entire section on the transgender topic: “Transgender: Love, Inclusion and Respect for All of God’s Children.” It has resources for understanding and supporting individuals with this as part of their experience.

In addition, the Church Handbook spells out policies that may affect transgender individuals. Sections 38.2.8.10 and 38.6.23 discuss persons who identify as transgender. Section 38.6.23 points out that most Church participation and some priesthood ordinances are gender neutral, and transgender individuals who have socially or medically transitioned can participate in all of these ordinances, including baptism and confirmation, though in some cases special approvals may be required.

However, the Church counsels against social and medical transition and transitioning can affect one’s participation in priesthood and temple ordinance. The Church warns that transitioning will result in membership restrictions, but also emphasizes that all other Church participation is welcome. A transgender person’s preferred name can be noted on the membership record so that ward members and leaders know the name that this person asks to be referred to by.

The handbook also points out in the same section that some transgender individuals are prescribed hormone therapy to ease gender dysphoria, and so long as this is not part of an attempt to transition, this will not result in membership restrictions or participation in gendered ordinances.

The Church has clarified that the intended meaning of the term ‘gender’ in the Family Proclamation refers to biological sex at birth.

How does the North Star Mission Statement apply to issues relating to Gender Identity?

The North Star mission emphasizes moving from solitude to community to ministry as individuals mature in their growth and understanding of their unique life journey as they seek to follow Christ more fully.

Starting with solitude, an individual draws closer to God and studies gospel truths, seeking individual revelation that aligns with those gospel truths regarding how to navigate their unique issues related to gender identity.

The individual can next move towards the community, building a positive and uplifting support network of family, friends, Church leaders, and perhaps even professionals who will support the person in living his or her values. We encourage individuals to use discernment of the Spirit in knowing whom to pick as friends and supporters in the community, which is vital to moving forward in faith.

“After a person is personally strengthened, and has nurtured self and others through the development of a healthy and faith-affirming support system, then he or she is able to engage in ministry. This ministry is where someone reaches out to others, attempting to draw them upward and help them on their way. When we are strengthened, we are to strengthen our brethren.”

These processes take a long time, even years, and isn’t perfectly linear – they can and do overlap. There is no rush to find all of the answers. It is important to be patient with yourself and others as individual answers are revealed, your friends and family grow along with you, and you and your support system are then able to reach out and help others. This is a life journey. Few if any have the answers to their gender dysphoria within a few years of seriously examining the issue. This takes time, study, thought, struggle, prayer, discussion, failure, hope, and the passage of lots of time to reach the point of ministry. Believe that it can get better as you work step by step to understand what the Lord expects of you in this experience.

Is there a place for me at Church?

Yes, there is a place for you at church! And our Church leaders continue to make that clear.

— Eric B. Murdock, “We All Long to Belong,” Church Magazines

“I worry that some of you feel you don’t fit in Relief Society, that you don’t belong! Whether you feel too young or too old, too rich or too poor, too intelligent or too undereducated, none of us is too different to belong! If I could have my heart’s desire, it would be that every one of you feel like you fit, like you belong. I testify that you do fit, that you do belong to Relief Society—the Good Shepherd’s fold for women.”

— Bonnie D. Parkin, Relief Society General President, “Belonging Is Our Sacred Birthright”

“I had a quorum. I am so grateful for my friends—my brothers—who loved and supported me. My quorum was a place of belonging. Some may have considered me a long shot and an underdog because of my family situation. Maybe I was. But priesthood quorums changed those odds. My quorum rallied around me and blessed my life immeasurably.

There are long shots and underdogs all around us. Perhaps we all are in one way or another. But each of us here has a quorum, a place where we can both receive strength and provide strength. The quorum is “all for one and one for all.” It is a place where we instruct each other, serve others, and build unity and brotherhood as we serve God. It is a place where miracles happen.”

— Elder Carl B. Cook, of the Seventy

The Savior invites us to come unto Him—no matter our circumstances. We come to church to renew our covenants, to increase our faith, to find peace, and to do as He did perfectly in His life—minister to others who feel like they don’t belong. ”

— Elder Todd Christofferson, Of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, “The Doctrine of Belonging”

How do I personally maintain a testimony of the Gospel of Jesus Christ?

Alma taught that we must plant seeds of faith, nourish them, and protect them from harm (Alma 32). If we do so, our understanding will be increased and our testimonies strengthened. We will be better able to discern truth and error. We plant these seeds of faith by believing and acting on the promptings we receive, we nourish them through studying our scriptures, prayer, church and temple attendance, and striving to keep our covenants. We protect our testimonies by carefully choosing which voices we invite to influence us.

Understanding the impact of Christ’s atonement in your personal life is foundational to a testimony of His gospel. He is your personal Savior and advocate with the Father. He will not leave your side. To maintain a testimony of Him, seek Him, learn about His life, stay in relationship with Him, and strive to represent Him by treating others as He would.

Maintaining and growing a testimony of Christ’s gospel requires effort, but you don’t need to be perfect to qualify for His help. Often the parts of us that seem most shameful are the ones that humble us and bring us closer to Him. Let go of feeling unworthy or feeling that you need to earn your place. Let Christ work in you and through you, no matter how many mistakes you feel you have made. He loves you.

What do the letters LGBTQ mean?

If you are not familiar with the meanings behind LGBTQ, here are some definitions. Many people use other terms they find more comfortable, or no terms at all. Some move from one term to another as they learn more about themselves.

• L: Lesbian is a woman who is primarily attracted to other women.
• G: Gay refers to men who are attracted to men, but many women use this term as well. It can be a general term meaning anyone attracted to their own gender. If someone identifies as gay, it does not necessarily mean they are in a same-sex relationship; they may just use it to describe their orientation, not their behavior.
• B: Bisexual women find themselves attracted to both men and women. This is usually a consistent pattern for their lives, not generally one random episode of same- or opposite-sex attraction.
• T: Transgender describes a person whose sense of personal identity and gender does not correspond with their sex at birth.
• Q: Queer is becoming more common, and can refer to either sexual orientation or gender identity or both (or neither). It is an umbrella term that covers many different situations. It can also refer to Questioning.

Being Transgender

The basis of an individual identifying as transgender is generally known as gender incongruence. Gender incongruence is when an individual feels an incompatible relationship between their gender identity and their biological sex at birth. This incongruence can present anywhere along a broad spectrum and include individuals that identify as gender non-conforming, gender fluid, gender non-binary, queer, etc. Some Intersex individuals may also experience incongruence with their gender assessed at birth by medical professionals or others. The distress that may accompany the incongruence is referred to as gender dysphoria or gender identity disorder. This distress can also present anywhere along a broad spectrum from very mild to extreme. Transgender individuals may describe this distress as a mild irritation, being gloomy, feeling unworthy, like constant motion sickness, constant static, “white noise”, or a pressure cooker building up steam and waiting to explode.

Because everyone is different, (if you’ve met one transgender individual, then you’ve met one transgender individual), and the distress is so varied, there is also a broad spectrum of ways transgender individuals try to cope with their own distress. Some determine that for themselves, a way to alleviate this distress may include social transitioning, medical transitioning (such as cross-sex hormones), or surgical transitioning which involves highly personal medical interventions.

“Keep in mind that not all transgender individuals experience dysphoria, and not all transgender individuals seek to socially, medically, or surgically transition. Conversely, not all people who experience gender dysphoria identify as trans. The transgender community is extremely diverse, and there are many differing experiences. ”

Social transitioning is sometimes referred to as gender expression and can include external manifestations of gender expressed through a person’s name, pronouns, clothing, haircut, behavior, voice, and/or body characteristics. Society identifies these cues as “masculine” or “feminine,” although what is considered “masculine” or “feminine” varies with time periods and cultures. Typically, transgender individuals seek to align their gender expression with their gender identity, rather than the sex they were assessed at birth. Social transitioning can be context-dependent: some may only socially transition in some contexts (such as at home) and not at others (such as at a place of employment).

Medically transitioning is the term commonly used for an individual that has elected hormone replacement therapy (HRT) in an effort to ease the dysphoria they experience. Though it is important to note that not everyone taking hormones is doing it for the purposes of medical transition. Surgical transitioning can involve a number of medical procedures such as detailed here (off site link). However, these decisions are private and highly personal, and it is generally considered highly impolite if not downright rude to ask questions about it, particularly (as is often the case) it’s merely to satisfy one’s curiosity.

“Sexual attraction and gender identity are totally distinct concepts. Transgender individuals experience incongruence with their gender identity and may be attracted to individuals of the same biological gender, the opposite biological gender, or may even be asexual. The experience of gender dysphoria is not a sexual temptation and therefore transitioning to alleviate gender dysphoria is not a violation of the law of chastity. Some people use the terms “androphilic” to refer to transgender individuals who are sexually attracted to biologically male individuals and “gynophilic” to those sexually attracted to biologically female individuals.”

“It is a common misconception that gender incongruence, like experiencing same-sex attraction, is a choice – that individuals “just want to be” the opposite gender, that “it’s just a phase” and that given time it will go away. It is important to realize that it is not a want or desire; the battle with gender incongruence is that the individual feels that he or she is, to the core, a gender that is different than their biological sex. These feelings are often tremendously difficult to manage and are frequently highly intrusive, and can result in tremendous, even excruciating, distress. Many things individuals may do to alleviate this distress may not be sins, and at any rate, it is usually not our place to judge. One’s internal feeling of gender dysphoria or incongruence can feel extremely, even painfully, compelling and real and it is difficult for those of us who haven’t had that experience to judge or counsel individuals who haven’t lived with that experience. ”

Sex vs. Gender

Sex refers to attributes that characterize biological maleness and femaleness. In humans, the best known attributes that constitute biological sex include the sex-determining genes, the sex chromosomes, internal reproductive structures, the external genitalia, and secondary sexual characteristics—features that tend to appear during puberty, especially those that distinguish the sexes. Gender refers to the psychological, behavioral, or cultural characteristics associated with maleness and femaleness.

What is Gender Binary?

This is a term referring to how society puts people into an either/or category of boy/girl. Some find this concept confining because many characteristics of maleness and femaleness overlap each other and very few people completely fit the stereotyped typical 100% feminine or 100% masculine (see Gender Role).

What is Gender Role?

Gender role refers to behaviors, attitudes, and personality traits that a society, in a given socio-cultural context or historical period, designates as masculine or feminine, or that is more typical of a male or female social role. These vary across, and even within, cultures.

What is Sex Role?

A sex role is distinct from a gender role in that it identifies a function or role that is unique and exclusive to a particular biological sex, as opposed to a social role generally assigned to or expected of one sex or another. An example of a sex role would be gestating, giving birth to, or breast-feeding a child. As much as a biological male may wish to give birth to a child, it’s not physically possible. An example of a gender role may be financial provider or cook; while it may be more common or expected in a given culture for a male to be a financial provider, in many cases a woman may be the financial provider in the home.

What is Gender Identity?

Gender identity refers to a person’s self-experienced or self-perceived basic sense of relative maleness (masculinity) or femaleness (femininity).

What is Gender Expression?

Gender expression refers to the way in which a person acts to communicate gender within a given culture; for example, through masculine or feminine behaviors, clothing, hair, communication patterns, and interests. A person’s gender expression may or may not be consistent with socially prescribed gender roles, and may or may not reflect his or her gender identity.

What is Gender Variance?

Gender variance refers to the behavior, appearance, or identity of persons who cross, transcend, or do not conform to culturally defined norms for persons of their biological sex.

What is Gender Non-Conforming?

This refers to a person who does not conform to society’s expected ways of ‘being’ a man or woman. An example could include a woman who chooses to become a truck driver but does not see herself as a man, and this could also include a young boy who wants to play dolls with the girls and experiences himself as more female than male. A gender non-conforming person may or may not feel distressed over his or her birth sex and may be non-conforming to a large or small degree.

What is Gender Dysphoria?

Gender dysphoria is a discomfort characterized by a feeling of incongruence between one’s chromosomal or natal sex and one’s internal sense of gender. It is also the new official diagnostic category in the American Psychiatric Association’s (APA) Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition (DSM-5) and does not inherently denote a disorder as the DSM-IV-TR did with its diagnostic category of Gender Identity Disorder (GID). The experience of gender incongruence and resulting gender dysphoria may take many forms and, thus, is considered to be a multicategory concept, and the DSM-5 acknowledges the wide variation of gender-variant conditions.

What is Gender Identity Disorder?

Gender Identity Disorder (GID) was a psychiatric diagnosis of gender incongruence first defined in the DSM-III. Its principal diagnostic criteria were gender dysphoria and strong and persistent cross-gender identification, resulting in clinically significant distress or impairment in social or occupational functioning. While it is no longer an official diagnostic category, because it was the diagnostic category that framed the research questions for over 30 years, it is still occasionally heard or seen in literature on this topic.

What is Transgender?

Transgender is a popular cultural term typically used as an umbrella term for many different identities. People who identify transgender have a gender identity and/or gender expression that does not line up with their biological sex. It’s also important to understand, however, that “transgender” is a cultural identity construct and not all people who are gender variant or who experience gender dysphoria identify as transgender, so its employment as an umbrella term, as oppose to an identity construct within the larger umbrella of gender variance, is somewhat problematic.

What is Cross-Dressing?

Dressing up as another gender, usually the opposite gender. A man might wear a dress, wig, and makeup, or he might just wear female undergarments that only he knows about. A woman might attempt to look completely masculine in hair cut, clothing, and demeanor, or she might just prefer some masculine clothing items. (See also: gender expression.)

What is Androgynous?

Being neither distinctly male or female in the way one dresses and acts. This may or may not refer to a third gender. A person can appear androgynous and be neither gender dysphoric or experience same-sex attraction, or they may appear androgynous and experience one or both.

What is Gender Queer?

An informal, colloquial term referring to the experience of not neatly fitting into the package of male, female, or transgender. Sometimes this term has a political undertone inferring that the person is deliberately and openly disavowing themselves from society’s ideas of the gender binary which they find to be restrictive or prejudiced. This person probably would describe themselves as the “third gender” or as “gender fluid.” (See also: Gender Non-Conforming)

What is Gender Fluid?

This term refers to the experience that some describe as floating between the genders, and can change from day to day or year to year. A person might experience feeling very feminine and in sync with feminine norms, and then through life experiences might align more with a feeling of being aligned with more masculine norms. This person would not necessarily self-identify as “transgender” because sometimes he or she does not experience being transgender at all.

What are Intersex Conditions or Disorders / Differences of Sex Development (DSDs)?

An intersex condition—now usually referred to as disorders (or differences) of sexual development or DSDs—is when a person is born with some atypical biological characteristics that are both male and female. This can manifest itself in ambiguous genitalia, development of secondary sex characteristics that are inconsistent with genitalia, atypical chromosomes (i.e., XXY or XYY), or in other ways are different from the typical development of male or female. Gender dysphoria may occur in individuals with a DSD, and some Intersex individuals may identify as transgender, but transgendered and intersex individuals are typically seen as being in separate categories to take actions aligned with the will of our Heavenly Father. In section 38.7.7 of the Handbook, under the heading “Individuals Whose Sex at Birth is Not Clear,” the Church counsels that “special compassion and wisdom are required when youth or adults who were born with sexual ambiguity experience emotional conflict regarding the gender decisions made in infancy of childhood and the gender with which they identify” and says that questions should be directed to the Office of the First Presidency.

How open should I be about my feelings?

The answer to that question is personal and entirely up to you–there is no single right answer for everyone. Most people, after recognizing this aspect of themselves, decide to sit with it for a while before sharing. When they do start to share, it is often on a limited, one-on-one basis, with carefully- selected people who are likely to respond with empathy and compassion. As you pray for direction, you will be led to know if the time is right for you to share and with whom. Most people find it helpful to eventually share their experiences with at least a few trusted people in their life. Feeling we do not carry this burden alone makes it feel much lighter and helps to release the shame we carry with it.

Should I tell my parents? How?

You and God are the best judges of when to talk to your parents. Those who do so often find that He has been working to prepare parents to hear and respond well, but others have a more negative experience. Asking God to guide you and having a group of wise and trusted friends or leaders you’ve already talked to can create a safety net and have it in place before you share with your parents. Some choose to talk to their parents in person, while others may write a letter or email that will give their parents time to process before talking about it. Counseling with God and with those He leads you to trust will help you decide when and how. When and if you do decide to share, inform your safety net that you’ll be doing so and that you’ll be checking in with them before and after you share.

Should I tell my Bishop or Branch President?

There are multiple reasons to talk with your Bishop or Branch President about your feelings. You may need help with the repentance process or you may want a spiritual advisor who can listen to you and offer an inspired perspective. You may also want to offer them help with others in the congregation who may experience similar feelings. Whether you talk to your leaders depends on your needs and the direction you receive when you pray. Because additional responsibilities have been delegated to Elders Quorums, Relief Societies, your Bishop or Branch President can use the inspiration that comes with these mantles to have one of the leaders help support you on an ongoing basis. This may be more comfortable for you, especially at first. If they don’t come up with this idea on thier own and you think it could be helpful, there is no harm in asking for it yourself.

Should I tell my Spouse?

Talking to your spouse can increase vulnerability and openness in your marriage. Vulnerability begets vulnerability. For many of us, we have found that through our vulnerability, our marriages have deepened and our relationships have been strengthened as we learn to trust each other with our deepest fears, shame or secrets.

It can also be a shock and create fear and confusion for your spouse. They will wonder what this means for themselves, for you, and for the relationship. Are you leaving the Church? Leaving the marriage? Pray for guidance to be aware of what their fears will be, and be specific in your intent. If there has been infidelity in your marriage, or friendships with unhealthy boundaries, your spouse may wonder what this means for the future of your marriage. If this has been an ongoing feeling, they may also already have noticed something and been worried about you, so finally knowing may also be a reassurance because at least they finally understand what is happening.

It’s important to understand that your spouse will need to go through their own process of coming to grips with this disclosure. That could look messy, just as your process might at times, so please remember to be patient with each other. Keep in mind that you’ve probably had years to think about this, and they are just learning about it for the first time. While you can help your spouse with this process, they will also likely need support from other individuals who have experience and understanding, or perhaps a trusted therapist or friend. You can encourage your spouse to get additional support. In fact, you need to be willing to let them discuss this with other people, though you might negotiate who this will be, they will undoubtedly need to talk to someone else about this.

This process of disclosure and new understanding may mean you and your spouse need to step back from other responsibilities in your church or community in order to focus on your relationship and your family, and this is totally fine.

Should I tell my Children?

Before you tell your children about yourself, you should have some conversations around the general topic of LGBT issues. If you feel nervous about broaching these topics, remember that they are learning about it as young as early elementary school. So they will either learn about this from you or from someone else who may not share your same values.

Often a good way to lead into the topic of gender identity is as part of the general topic of sexuality and gender. Experts say it is important to have multiple conversations with your children about sexuality, not just one conversation and then never speak of it again. The Liahona has a good article about how to discuss sexuality with your children, and a series of videos on this topic in the Gospel Library.

When discussing our own sexuality with our children, we should always teach them about this topic at an age-appropriate level. Ask God to give you the right words to say to address the fears they may feel about the future of the family and their own well-being. One way to talk to your children is to bring up this topic and simply answer the questions that they ask you.

Before telling your children about your feelings, it is helpful to set up a support system for them before you tell them. This will allow them to talk to others they trust, in addition to you, when questions and/or fears arise that they may not, at first, be comfortable speaking with you about directly.

If you have been open to others about your situation, the chances of your children finding out about you from someone else are increased. So when weighing whether or not to tell your children, consider whether you would prefer your children to learn about this from you or from someone else.

Most of us have found it to be a bonding experience when we talk to our children and have found our family relationships strengthen through this process.

Can I be happy and single in the Church?

The short answer is a resounding “Yes!” Although remaining single may be part of our mortal experience, it helps to remember that each stage of our lives has its own opportunities and blessings. This is a frequent topic of discussion at our annual conferences as well as in our various firesides and online forums. For some, singleness is a bitter reality, which we may bemoan as devoid of companionship and intimacy. All of us experience the pain of loneliness at times—yes, even some of us who are married. And though we may not have the opportunity to marry in this life, many single individuals within our community are leading joyful lives, receiving deeply satisfying intimacy from fulfilling companionships with friends and family.

It’s been most helpful for many of us in our pursuits of joy to reframe our mindsets about who we can form companionships with and what it means to give and receive intimacy. We have also found it crucial to recognize that joy is not contingent on whether we marry and start a family. Joy is not an achievement. Joy is something we receive from the Holy Spirit as we lose our lives and wills in the service of our Savior, Jesus Christ. Our relationship with Him and our Heavenly Parents is our source of joy. We have found that as we’ve made Jesus the source of our joy, it has enriched our lives and relationships with others, replacing whatever loneliness we may feel instead with peace, love, and satisfaction.

We find particularly meaningful the message from Blake Fisher, “Faith in Christ, Not Outcomes“, the North Star keynote by Catholic thinker Eve Tushnet, and the North Star conference keynote by Tim Timmerman.

This talk from Elder Neil L. Anderson provides inspiration to those of us single and choosing to remain faithful to our covenants:

There are so many, young and old, who are loyal and true to the gospel of Jesus Christ, even though their own current experience does not fit neatly inside the family proclamation: children whose lives have been shaken by divorce; youth whose friends mock the law of chastity; divorced women and men who have been gravely wounded by the unfaithfulness of a spouse; husbands and wives who are unable to have children; women and men who are married to a spouse who does not share their faith in the restored gospel; single women and men who, for various reasons, have been unable to marry.

One friend of nearly 20 years, whom I admire greatly, is not married because of same-sex attraction. He has remained true to his temple covenants, has expanded his creative and professional talents, and has served nobly in both the Church and the community. He recently said to me, “I can sympathize with those in my situation who choose not to keep the law of chastity in the world in which we live. But didn’t Christ ask us to be ‘not of this world’? It is clear that God’s standards are different from those of the world.”

Some will say, “You don’t understand my situation.” I may not, but I testify that there is One who does understand. There is One who knows your burdens because of His sacrifice made in the garden and on the cross. As you seek Him and keep His commandments, I promise you that He will bless you and lift the burdens too heavy to bear alone. He will give you eternal friends and opportunities to serve. More important, He will fill you with the powerful Spirit of the Holy Ghost and shine His heavenly approval upon you. No choice, no alternative that denies the companionship of the Holy Ghost or the blessings of eternity is worthy of our consideration.

I know the Savior lives. I witness that He is the source of all truth that really matters and that He will fulfill all the blessings He has promised to those who keep His commandments.